What doesn't make me laugh

The vacuum broke. It happens. A discourse occurs about vacuums including what kind, what makes, prices, places to purchase vacuums. Today at the corner of Sears and Lowes another discussion begins.

Me, Want to look at vacuums today?
Him after long pause for effect, Okay.
He drives into Sears parking lot. Okay. Apparently this is where he wants to look first.
Me, Okay we can look here but I DO NOT WANT a Kenmore. NO Kenmores. I don't like them. Everything we have purchased that was a Kenmore has been junk. NO KENMORES.
We go inside the store. Through the door that leads to the power tools of course.
Me, No looking at tools. We are not here to buy tools.
He grins and looks as I usher him past the table saws. Whoops, there are also aisles of other tools on the way to the vacuums. We see them and begin to look. I pass all the Kenmores looking for the Dysons which I really want. He passes me and begins to look at tank style vacuums.
Me, Didn't we discuss this? Didn't we decide on an upright?
Him, No. He keeps looks at tanks.
Salesman comes along. Can I help you?
My first thought is I don't know, can you?
Me, Hello. Probably.
Me to Him, well, have you decided we need a tank or are we going to look at uprights?
Him, Tank. We want a tank type.
Me, Really? When did you decide this?
Him, no comment, keeps looking.
I stare for a few minutes. He isn't looking back. I give in.
Me, Okay, so what do you want in a tank vacuum.
Him, I want gadgets.
Me to Salesman, He wants gadgets. Which one is the best rated?
Salesman shows Him only the Kenmores.
This continues for a while. The end of the story is he buys a KENMORE with GADGETS in RED and GREY because it is what he wants. Does he do the vacuuming? Nope.
I absolutely hate red and I really hate red with grey. And Kenmores.

From now on, he vacuums because it is his toy.

Let's see how long the war lasts.

1 comment:

robyn said...

man oh man. i've had the same sorts of battles. i don't get why men think that if it's got a machine it's their toy, even when they don't use it.

if you can live with the carpets getting a little dirty, i say just hold out. stubborn as you can be, just don't vaccuum. and when he complains, tell him "your toy, your job."

good luck!